Dead Inside
by Amagoi
Summary: DISCONTINUED:: Kagome's always had a troubled life, but no matter what, she's always found something that could help her numb her pain. After having her heart stomped on again, she attempts to numb that pain, but this time...she went too far.
1. Regretful Mornings

Author's Notes: I hope you all enjoy this story! I've been working REALLY hard on this idea. The plot monkeys refused to stop screeching in my head, until I did their bidding, so here's the first chapter :3 It's an Inuyasha fanfic, but it has some concepts from the anime Yu Yu Hakusho, and the movie Ghost. Haha, you'll see :D

**Full Summary: **The young Higurashi Kagome is just a normal teenage girl, growing up in a bad city…like most troubled teenagers, she lives in a world of drinking, smoking, partying, sex, & other sinful duties. Yet, Kagome always seems to find a way to numb her certain pain. One day, after having her heart broken in half (again) by her rival (and before you ask, NO, it's not the typical Kikyou), she once again attempts to numb her pain. Just this time…she went a _little_ too far. But could this ending be a new beginning after all? (yeah, the summary sucks, but the story ain't half bad xD;)

Disclaimer: Holy gravy peanut butter, Batman! She doesn't own Inuyasha or the song Break Stuff by Limp Bizkit! She's a poor little girl with nooooothing! To the Batmobile, dadadada!

* * *

The light was blinding. She slowly opened her eyes in slits, & the light inside the back of the Ambulance seemed brighter then anything she'd ever seen in her life. Was it even the ambulance light at all? 'Damn it…I'm still conscious…?' she asked to herself absentmindedly, as her body burned with the pain of a thousand suns, she wanted to scream, but her voice seemed to have gone.

She would have rather been unconscious at that moment.

Through her extremely blurred vision, she watched as the people around her ran frantically to random places in the crowded ambulance, pushing oxygen masks & I.V.s into & unto her body. The prick of needles; a small comparison to the already inflicted wounds that ran about her arms & hands. Blood ran through her clothing, turning her beforehand white & navy-blue clothes a deep, dark red. A crimson that had already seeped unto the hospital bed they had put her on.

A steady 'Beep. Beep.'-ing sound seemed to be ringing through all the commotion, making itself heard as if the world would end if it should stop with it's oddly calmly lullaby of life.

She couldn't see, she couldn't breath, the immense pain inflicting on her outer-body & insides seemed to set her on fire, yet freeze her at the same time; in a unique-unbearable pain she'd never felt before. Her mind was panicking, racing wildly, yet disturbingly numb at the same time, as if her body's senses were slowly shutting down on her so that she would soon no longer be able to feel the emotion of Panic & Fear. It all felt like a nightmare, yet it was more real then something she could ever imagine in her wildest dreams or illusions. For the first time, she suddenly realized that someone had been holding tightly onto her hand. Clasping unto it firmly, tightly & desperately, as if it were a precious lifeline.

In pain, she turned her head ever so slightly to see to the left of her, gently moving the attached Oxygen Mask with her. The person's figure was blurred, just as everyone else's was, but it was the same person that had found her in the long amount of minutes beforehand, just in her current state, she couldn't fully realize that. The only thing that seemed visible was his spiked-black hair.

And his tears. He was crying, sobbing wildly like a child that had just lost it's favorite toy.

She could suddenly see his mouth moving frantically up & down when the awareness that she was now conscious hit him, but she couldn't read his words, her hearing quickly dieing with her other senses following. Why did everything seemed to be blurred, & moving so slow? She could not hear his voice, but he was most likely yelling words of support to her, or asking her not to leave him, just like he had done in her room.

She couldn't exactly tell who it was, but deep down in her heart, she knew so well.

Her eyes suddenly filled up with tears. She felt so guilty, for some reason that hadn't hit her as of yet. Her eyes, now refusing to stay open, kept fluttering opened & closed. Every time she closed them, they seemed to stay closed a little longer then the time before. She felt so tired. Having the internal feeling that her life was slowly slipping from her, she opened her mouth slightly, as her building tears now flowed down, dripping down her cheeks & onto the sheets of the bed. With her last breath, she whispered out two words to the person, her dieing words.

"I'm sorry…"

She said in an almost inaudible whisper, taking her last breath with them. And she closed her eyes. Yet this time they did not open again, and stayed closed, concealing for chocolate-brown eyes forever.

Her hand feel limp in his own. And with her last breath, her last living view of the world, she was gone.

* * *

**_Hi. As you've probably already realized, this girl, in this ambulance, has now passed on…(like, DUH)_ **

_**What you probably don't realize, is that this girl was me.**_

_**Who am I, you ask? I am Higurashi Kagome, regular everyday school girl, that has been corrupted by drugs, alcohol, suicide attempts, blah blah. Yes, just like every other school girl, except I'm not knocked-up, like some people…you get the point.**_

**_Anyhow, when I left for school earlier this morning, slight hangover & all, I did not plan to die. Actually, the day turned out quite…normal…even though it DEFINITELY wasn't the best I've ever had. I fought with my mother, I embarrassed my brother, I talked to my friends, I started a public brawl on school grounds, & I teased & kicked the crap out of my rival. It was a very normal day indeed. Yet, dieing is something new for me. I don't think I'll do it again anytime soon…(HA! Get it? It was a joke…-ahem-) Did anyone kill me? How did I die? You ask me. Well, when I came home...um.._**

_**…hmm, maybe it's just better if I start from the beginning…**

* * *

MUCH EARLIER THAT MORNING:_

"Okay you two whores, get up, or get a room." Kagome commanded to her two friends while smirking. But after a few seconds of no change in scenery, Kagome turned around, and poked her head over the car seat she was sitting in, "Hey, Miroku-kun, get off my best friend & drive me home…'ey, stop making out you two, and listen to me!"

"Aye, Kagome-chaaaan, do you need to yell…? My head is throbbing…" her friend Sango asked quizzically & groggily as she popped her up from the back of the car, and rubbed her hand against her forehead in an attempt to sooth her aching head, not to mention her upset stomach. Miroku was firmly attached to her, and refused to stop kissing the nape of his girlfriend's neck, even when she moved up to look at her friend in the front-passenger seat. Kagome gave out a weak laugh, she could tell by the way Sango's voice dragged that she was either very drunk or high. "Well, you have been loading it with pot & sake, of course it's going to throb, baka. What did you expect it to do, the Chicken Dance?" Kagome answered voluntarily.

"Damn, I hate it that you always act so sarcastic…" Sango hissed. "Kagome-chan, why do you want to go home?" Miroku questioned her, after finally managing to detached himself from Sango's neck. "Just get up here already." she answered dully, not even giving her spare strength up to turn around in the passenger's seat to face them. "Why, because your family is _not_ worrying about you?" he questioned her again, giving her a taste of her own sarcastic-medicine. But even after asking her, he squeezed his body through the slit between the driver's & passenger's seats, & plopped himself down next to Kagome in the driver seat. He knew perfectly well, that if he made the girl angry, she wouldn't hesitate to rip his arm off in frustration, fore you see, Kagome was _very_ good at fighting. In this town, you needed to be tough. It was dog-eat-dog world.

"Just shut up, and drive" Kagome commanded plainly while staring at the steering wheel mechanically. Miroku eyed her suspiciously, "Kagome-chan, are you feeling alright? You don't look so good." Miroku stated out with a hint of concern in his voice. Kagome huffed, now irritated, "I'm fine. Now just take me home." she answered again nonchalantly while she picked up a bottle of Sake, & started chugging. Miroku was slightly surprised, but not of Kagome's stubborn-ness, he would have expected her to throw something at him or something in that fashion for his nagging & questioning. "Why? Is it late? Early?" Miroku continued.

Kagome hesitated, "…maybe, I dunno."

Miroku looked at her strangely again, "What do you mean by 'I dunno'?"

Then she pointed to a miniature digital clock that had a bright green background, & black pixeled digits, that was attached to the front of the inside of the car, "Depends. Is that a 10, 11, or a 1?"

"It says 1:11 AM…" Miroku answered calmly.

Then Kagome felt someone's hand thwack her against the back of her head lightly, "Ha! And you say _I'm_ high? Girl can't even read a freakin' clock in front of her face." then a thud was heard, as Sango dropped back down to the backseat trying to calm her aching head & protesting stomach. A low growl could be heard erupting from the teenage miko, "You know, Sango-chan, you seem to have a lot more guts when you're plumb drunk! Maybe we should permanently tape a Big Gulp to your mouth, and fill it with wine. Then I wouldn't have to save your ass when a guy tries to force himself on you!" and with that, she glanced quickly over to Miroku…who now had a nervous look on his face, 'B-but, I'm her boyfriend, God dammit, I have sexual rights!' Miroku wanted to protest aloud, but thought it better to keep his mouth shut & his feelings solemn. Sango hadn't even been really listening, and just mumbled something incoherent to the two.

But Sango was right. She'd loaded up on so much Sake, & blah that she felt as if she could barf up a lung. She felt so dizzy & tired, and whenever she looked at something, it came up to her as a giant lump of "Blurness", or it was showing up in doubles. The bottle she had started chugging to show Miroku that she was "Fine" wasn't making her feel any better. At all. If anything, it made her feel much worse. The strong taste of the alcohol spiked against her throat as it cascaded down towards her stomach, and she struggled to even swallow. Slender brownish colored bottles lined every nook & cranny of the old, blue car that the teens sat in on the lonely street. More then half of them, were empty. They clanged as the three moved around in any way, soundful symbols of how they got empty in the first place. The strong smell of burnt drugs that floated throughout the car gagged her throat & lungs.

She hated it.

She hated it all. But she did it all anyway…with her friends. It numbed the pain of life. And oh, what a horrible pain _that_ was.

But yet, she wanted nothing more then for Miroku to start the damn car, so she could go home! What was there for her at home, you ask? A alcoholic-prostitute Mother? A gang-leader younger brother? A Father that was no where to be found (Not like she'd want him to come back anyway)? Nothing. There was really nothing for her at the place she reluctantly called "Home". Most of the time she didn't even go Home, but stayed out with her "Friends", and partied, drank, and did every other Sin of Life. But oh so badly, she just wanted to go home to her warm — or more likely, cold — bed, and fall asleep, and pretend that none of this was real…that none of it existed. But it was nothing less then that of pure reality.

It was real. It was there. It was Life.

And the problem with life, is that you need to live it, whether you like it or not. That…or not live it at all, of course.

"Open the windows…" a female voice slurred towards the two from the back of the car. "Nani?" Miroku asked in confusion, as he tilted his head slightly backwards to get a good look at her, "Do you need to barf?" he questioned her smirking. "Idiot, If Kohaku smells the…if he finds out we were using his car for smoking & stuff, my brother'll…just open the damn windows, baka…" she commanded, yet again, in a slightly slurred voice. It was obvious that she was having a hard time thinking straight. But even though, it was immediately obvious of what she had tried to get across. This car wasn't theirs, but Sango's brother's Kohaku's car. Actually, they were too young to be driving. They were too young to Smoke, Drink, and do all that other stuff, too. But they did it anyway. So, yeah.

(AN: In this story, Kohaku is older then Sango. Kagome, Miroku, Sango, & the rest of the students at their school that they associate with are 16, unless otherwise stated. Pretend that 16 is too young to drive, you doofs. It is in some countries xD;)

Kagome quickly put her hand up to the bar covered in black plastic, that controlled the opening & closing of the window next to her, and started to gladly roll down the window. She needed fresh air, she needed to get the gagging aroma away from her. Suddenly Miroku's joke question to Sango when she had requested for them to open the windows popped into her mind for a split-second. And since she did feel like doing that so much, now she would have a clear path, ne? God, she hated all this…

She would never, _ever _admit that she felt so horrible...that she wanted to go home so badly. Never would she admit that all this toxins that she willingly planted into her body didn't give her that high that she wanted. Never would she admit that she didn't like _doing_ all this. Because then that would label her a baby, a weakling, and other things teenagers would never want to be labeled.

Then, why? For her friends? To Fit in? Because it was a way of life for her now? No…& Yes. She would admit, these things gave her the temporary pleasure & unawareness of the real world. But, those 'Pleasures' were only temporary…then it would start to sink in. The real reason, the real purpose, the real feeling would sink in…and then reality would snap back with a vengeance,& suddenly, you just don't feel so good anymore…

"And get outta-of that seat, this innnn-stant Miroku…" Sango commanded, again with the slurred voice, as she struggled to poke her head over the two back seats again, "This is miyyy bro's car, and only I can drive it…without his pur-meh-shion, not yer…"

Miroku looked up at his girlfriend that was trying to poke her head over the backseats with smug amusement, and a mischievous grin planted itself on his face that he just couldn't seem to push away, "Kagome-chan, do we _need_ to go home now? Sango is in no position to struggle if I would have happened to force myself upon her…may I please take advantage of this rare-event?" Miroku asked calmly & politely, as if it were routine to ask that, which it kinda was. Sango herself was a very slightly strong girl, and could probably punch Miroku's lights out if he ever tried to "force himself", but Kagome really didn't know the reason why she would do exactly that. They'd done it plenty of times, it wasn't like it was a new thing… Kagome knew, or was pretty sure, that Miroku was just kidding. He'd never really take advantage of Sango like that…would he?

Kagome raised an eyebrow at the boy, "How the hell are you able to ask such a question, and still sound like perfect gentlemen?" she inquired half-heartedly. "Call it a gift." Miroku responded slyly, stroking his chin & putting on that perverted grin that would make any girl either get weak in the knees or run to call 911.

All thoughts were broken, as that same femininely husky & slurred voice spoke up again, "Gets outta the seat, Mir, I'm drivin'…"

"Oh yes, like you're in a better position to drive?" Miroku humored the drunken girl, adding another one of his trade-mark smirks to the end of his question. Yup, that smirk. The same smirk he always used when a girl's skirt would fly up. The 'ol pervert. Although in that quick amount of time, he'd forgotten his silly plea to take advantage, fore he had just been kidding…well, at least _half-_kidding.

"Well, it's not like you're any sober-er." Kagome stated out before Sango had a chance to try. She was gladly feeling a tiny bit better, now that the window was open. A bit of the cool breeze washed against her face, lightly ruffling a string of her hair towards her right side, "You had just as much as the rest of us, if not more."

"Yes, but I'm able hold it, & control it all better" Miroku responded with a sly wink. Kagome swore, if it weren't that he was a friend of hers, she'd report him for Sexual Harassment. He looked as if every thought in his mind was perverted & pleasing to him, and it crept her out sometimes, but over the years she had gotten much used to it. And sometimes even found it humorous.

Sango, after quietly listening to the weird conversation, decided not to fight anymore, and plopped herself back so she could lay down on the back of two seats again. Miroku, having finally decided that this argument was over, turned the key in the ignition, and the car suddenly awoke with a giant rumble as the engine started. They all expected the car to start moving soon after, but after about 30 seconds, "Miroku…you put your foot on the gas petal, if you didn't know" Kagome said with her sarcastic-tone that everyone knew of. Miroku had seemed lost in thought, until Kagome had added that comment, "I know" he said to her firmly, giving her a slight annoyed-stare, "Maybe we should call a cab or something…y'know? I am _drunk_…after all…"

Kagome would have laughed her head off if she hadn't felt so crappy, "Heh, and remind me, when did you become an after-school-special, again?" yet again, dripping with sarcasm.

Miroku gave her another serious glare. "Oh, so you're serious?" Kagome asked him with sarcasm again. But Miroku _was_ being serious, or at least semi-serious. If they had a car crash, & one or more of them happened to die, he wouldn't wanna live with that guilt. Of course, they had done this plenty of times before, so Kagome didn't understand how he could be getting cold-feet now. Maybe it was because, before he was always too stoned, that he hadn't had the conscious to stop himself anyway. But now he had control over his actions.

Kagome groaned with impatience, and suddenly moved her foot over to the driver's side of the car, and stomped her foot down hard on the gas petal. Suddenly the car, without warning, shot up and for a few seconds zoomed forward a few 10, or so, feet. But Miroku quickly, after regaining composure, stomped his foot on the brake petal, and kicked Kagome's left leg back to her side of the car, "…are you mad, woman!" Miroku inquired with surprise & frustration, glad that he had been able to stop the car before it rear ended one that was a bit in front of them now.

"Then just drive the car already!" Kagome protested in comeback. She wanted to go home so much, "Ha, well…if you're scared, then I'll do it" she added smiling arrogantly at his sudden stage-fright-ness.

"I am _not _scared." Miroku shot back coolly, trying to regain the bit of lost pride. Then Miroku seemed to stop & think, he could live with Kagome having the crash, so then he wouldn't have to take all the guilt, (AN: Yes, he's being an idiot right now xD) "How many fingers am I holding up?" he asked her quizzically, while holding up 4 fingers. Kagome highly concentrated on his hand, as if she was trying to count how many crumbs were on the bottom of a cookie jar. "…Damn it, I would be able to count, if you'd stop moving your fucking hand back and forth" Kagome answered in annoyance.

Miroku stared at her stupidly, "Um, Kagome-chan…I'm not moving my hand…"

"Oh…" Kagome stated nervously, feeling quite stupid at the moment, "..really?"

Miroku just sighed, "That's it, I'm calling a cab-" he started as he made a motion to get out of the car, but Kagome put her hand on his shoulder to stop him & gave a frustrated sigh, "If the driver finds out about us kids drinking, & smoking and crap…well…y'know. I'm not spending the night in jail…again. Idiot. Now just drive the damn car, already!" she blurted out in bits.

Miroku, now tired with fighting with her, finally decided to give in, "Aren't you worried at all that we might crash into a house or something?" he questioned her with a sigh, but slowly he put his foot on the gas petal, & the car moved forward & started heading down the barren road, "Don't you fear for your life?"

Kagome sighed, "Well, no, because we're not living…"

"Wha-the…?" Sango mumbled aloud, now revealing that she hadn't passed out on the backseat as the two had thought after all. Miroku also looked at Kagome confusedly & then rolled his eyes, "Oh come on god, she's going to do another poem thing, isn't she…?" Miroku sighed as he focused on the road in front of him, asking his question towards nothing in particular, as if he excepted the air to answer it.

Kagome groaned inwardly, and glared at Miroku for few seconds (which he didn't even seem to notice), and after clearing her throat she continued, "Our bodies may be here, but I sure as hell wouldn't call this existence living. Every person on this planet is dead in reality…when we're born, we're hollow…hollow shells of a human waiting to be filled with the influence of the world. So, we're never really living, we're all robots…pons in the game of life. No purpose but to do what we're taught…we can't create our own thoughts, our own trends, our own religions…we have to go out & live within the ones that already exist _for_ us. We have no say in our own lives, and have to be brought up the way the world wants us to. So, in truth, we're all just…Dead Inside, I guess."

Miroku just rolled his eyes again. "Wow…deep…" Sango said in awe after she had finished.

"You understood that?" Miroku asked a question meant for Sango, as he did a right-hand turn on a street after the light finally flashed green. "No…but it was still deep…" Sango answered stupidly, still drunk as clam. "Heh, I'm just too smart for you two I guess!" Kagome chimed in with a weak smile while laughing lightly. Kagome leaned her head against the sill of the car-window, and let the cool breeze wash over her as the car slowly drove down the empty, black streets

_Hollow shells of a human waiting to be filled with the influence of the world…  
We're really just…Dead Inside…_


	2. Family Hates & Loves

Disclaimer: I donnot own Inuyasha! DUH :P And not the song Break Stuff by Limp Bizkit!

* * *

"Okay, it's your stop." Miroku informed Kagome as if he were a cabby straight out of New York, and they stopped on a dark street while a blue house stood in front of the car. The house, as formally stated, was blue & the windows & doors were painted a dingy white. The front yard had grass, but it was all quite dead. It was a very plain house, and like most of the houses on the street, it looked very dark & dingy, some would maybe call it ugly. The words "SKOUKI" in giant black & red Graffiti letters were painted on the left side that they were too lazy to try & clean off, a marking of some unknown gang, probably the one Souta was apart of. The little fugitive… 

A click & a loud squeak was heard throughout the dead street, as Kagome opened the car door and proceeded to step out of the car on her right leg. Once she got outside, she suddenly stumbled forward, and almost fell down. Now that there was no car seat to sit in, gravity was taking action on her dizzy body, "You okay?" Miroku asked her calmly, as she held unto the door for support.

"Yeah, 'course" Kagome replied cooly, keeping on her 'I don't feel like crap' facade. Then Kagome paused before she continued to walk the way to her front door, and turned around to glare daggers at Miroku, surprising the boy for her sudden switch in attitude. "Take her _straight home_!" Kagome commanded forcefully, then took another moment to point at Sango in the backseat, whom of had finally passed out (well, she had her eyes closed & wasn't really moving, at least). "If I find out you did anything to her, I'll get a knife, & remove your reasons for wanting to take advantage in the first place…" Kagome hissed at him, showing that she was dead serious. It was always Kagome's job to make sure Sango was safe, she was like she was a big sister to the girl, even though Sango was a few months older.

Miroku just put his innocent face on, "Of _course_, Kagome-chan…!", then he let out a nervous laugh, and rubbed the back of his neck with both fear & nervousness etched unto his face. Kagome's anger seemed to dissipitate as fast as it had come, and she turned around towards her door once again, "See ya tomorrow!" Kagome called out behind her, as she heard the car drive away, "Actually, it's 'I'll see you Today'…" she mumbled to herself in correction while she turned the door knob on the door, and it opened easily, "Hmph, it was unlocked…why am I not surprised?" she muttered to herself, as she opened the door, & slid inside the house, turning around quickly to close the door behind her as quietly as she could.

From what she had seen, before she had turned around, the house was dark & no lights were on. But weirdly, the house was brightly lit by the moonlight that shone through the windows.

"I was wondering when you'd be home…" a voice of a young boy rang towards her, breaking the silence suddenly & shocking her for a split second from surprise. The sound of a click could be heard, as the boy put down a Sake bottle he had been drinking. "Were you worried 'bout me?" she asked back, not being able to stop a loving smirk appearing unto her face. She didn't even have to turn around to know who it was, but when she did, her guess was confirmed. It was Souta, her little brother.

He was only a few inches shorter then Kagome, and had short black hair, which was spiked up messily with hair gel to make it look 'Cool', and he wore a black shirt, that had the sleeves ripped off, to make it look more grungy. He wore blue dirty-looking jeans, and it looked as if the knees of the pants had been cut through with a knife, so there were holes in the kneecaps of his jeans. His face was accompanied by a few cuts, the most noticable one on his chin. Kagome had always found that her little brother looked odd, as a gang-type-person. Like he was in the wrong story, and was supposed to be something like a Computer Geek in an alternate universe, or something other.

"Hmph, course not…" Souta answered cockily, sticking his tongue out at her childishly in the process, although he made it quite obvious that he was trying to hide that very fact, why else would he stay up this early or keep averting his eyes when she'd ask a question like that? Souta always worried about his sister, it had become a habit, "Where were you, and what were you doing?" he questioned her with a slight bit concern in his voice, even though he still tried to hide it the best he could.

Kagome stifled a small smile that was starting to creep onto her face, he may have been a mini-fugitive, carrying around guns & graffiti cans galore, but he was still her little brother. "It's really none of your business." Kagome replied confidently, but her confident façade quickly broke when THUD, she accidentally bumped into a wall while continuing to walk to her room again, "Ow…when did that wall get there…? Hehe…" Kagome blurted out stupidly with embarrassment, trying to add humor to the scene. She then rubbed her shoulder, which had suddenly gotten so painfully acquainted with the wooden wall.

"You're drunk…" Souta stated out nonchalantly yet with an obnoxious hint of triumph, as if he had gotten the answer to the Million Dollar Question correct, yet the 'Million Dollar Question' had been easy to answer. For a few things, her pupils were very dilated, and there was hint of redness on her cheeks & over her nose, not to mention the way she had staggered towards him. "Thank you Sherlock. Now if you can tell me what other things I took or did tonight, you get to enter the bonus round." Kagome answered back sarcastically, as she tried to straighten up from her hunched over position on the wall. But as she straightened out her legs, they suddenly gave way again, and she feel unto the floor on her knees.

Kagome just gave out an annoyed grumble, 'I can already tell, that this day is just going to suck..' Kagome thought to herself with an inward sigh. And she didn't know it at the moment, but this would in fact, _not_ be her day. _Not at all._

"Wow, so this is my role-model, eh? I'm so lucky" Souta commented in with a smirk, picking up some of his sister's sarcasm. "Damn it, _shut up_, Souta-chan." Kagome commanded snappily, she was getting tired of all this, 'Little brat…' she thought angrily. Kagome was surprised when suddenly there was a hand in front of her face…and it looked like it was there to help her up?

Kagome stared at it with a confused look. "Get up. Do you know how pathetic you look, Onee-chan?"

"Heh…" was all Kagome could think of answering, before she lifted her right hand, and allowed Souta to pull up the majority of her weight so she could stand, letting go after she was fully straight. Then she walked along the wall towards her bedroom, making sure one hand was against some type of furniture or other object, assuring that there was a high change she wouldn't fall again.

The house was eerily quiet, and it seemed as if only the two of them were home, "…so, where's Okaa-san?" Kagome asked hesitantly to her brother, but she already knew what the answer was. "I dunno…probably out…" Souta said looking down nervous & placing his hands in his pockets, "…well, ya know…" not wanting to have to finish his explanation.

Kagome understood why he didn't want to finish his sentence. You wouldn't want to say it out loud either if your mother was a Hooker, and she'd probably put a gun to someone's head, just so she could get a little extra Booze…

Kagome gave out an exasperated sigh, as she sat with a PLOP onto her bed, and limply fell over landing her head perfectly on her pillow, letting out another sigh in the process with a small smile lacing her lips. "I've never seen you so happy to be home…" Souta commented suspiciously, "Were you _really_ looking forward to seeing your 'Family'? I think not."

That's it. Kagome had had enough.

Suddenly without warning, she grabbed Souta's chin & turned his face towards her, forcing him to look into her brown eyes, scaring him for a second, "Stop. Talking like that." Kagome commanded him slowly, a serious look in her eyes. "Why?" Souta asked with a raised eyebrow, sincerely wondering why.

"Because you remind me so much of him…all cocky like that…dammit, I think you spent too much time around him. You even act like him now, it's fucking annoying…that chapter of my life has ended, so stop reminding me, alright?" Kagome answered, talking more to herself then to Souta.

Souta raised an eyebrow, "Who - what - are you talking about…?" Souta asked slowly & suspiciously as if she were crazy, but deep down he knew, if only he had just realized.

The past seemed so far away now…how easily people forget.

Kagome let go of his chin, and rolled over in the bed so that her back was facing him, "No one. Just someone that I hate with a passion, someone from the not so distant past…" Kagome answered again in more a whispered mumble. Souta, now completely confused, just rolled his eyes & shrugged, "Well, G'night…see you tomorrow…or _Today_, actually…" and walked out of the room, heading for his bedroom a few steps down the hall.

'…and the past is better left _forgotten_.' Kagome thought to herself, as she slowly drifted off into sleep.

* * *

The blow-dryer hummed as it's hot air blew through Kagome's raven-black hair, slowly drying the soaked locks of hair that were cold & wet from showering. It was now morning, 6:42 AM to be exact, & after having emptied her stomach of the crap she had filled it with last night, Kagome was getting ready to head for school. She had music playing, a radio to be exact, in the bathroom; Break Stuff by Limp Bizkit was blaring through her ears.

It's just one of those days  
When you don't wanna wake up  
Everything is fucked  
Everybody sucks  
You don't really know why  
But want justify  
Rippin' someone's head off

After her hair was dry enough, Kagome examined herself in the mirror.

She wore her normal school uniform. A plain white shirt with short sleeves, with a few buttons that went down the front, with a navy blue mini-skirt that stopped about 2 inches above her knees. A little lower, there were high, loose-fitting, white socks that stopped a few inches below her knees, and on her feet were plain navy blue shoes that had small buckles in the front. About 3 of the buttons in the front of her shirt were un-buttoned, revealing a bit of her cleavage teasingly, or more her black-lacy bra really, and around the lowered shirt-collar, a navy-blue & gray tie with horizontal stripes was tied loosely around her neck. The tie wasn't part of the uniform, but Kagome thought it made her look better. It was one of Souta's, from one of his formal suits that he'd never,_ ever_ use in a million years.

All the way from her silky raven hair, to her melting chocolate brown eyes, to her large-full breasts, & down to her full thighs & slender legs, she was like the Goddess of Eye-Candy to males around this city. Any normal high school boy would be hungry to take her, not to mention every sick adult. It was needless to say that she was quite beautiful & sexy.

But Kagome was one of those beautiful things that you would dare not touch, and only marvel at it's magnificence.  
Or get your hands burned for trying, at least.

Yet, looking at her profile in the mirror, the corners of Kagome's mouth slowly turned downward in a frown. She would have looked perfect, if it weren't for the large amount of scars & slashes on her arms & wrists. Another hobby, I guess you could say…or more, another way to _numb pain_.

Just like all the rest.

Kagome sighed. How annoying it was, that she'd have to wear the short-sleeved version of her uniform for summer. Well, it was either that, or melt during those unbearably hot days. Although, this beginning summer was more cool, but better safe then sorry.

She sighed again, and decided that she had to start the day sooner or later, and then proceeded to open the closed bathroom door. Kagome jumped back when she noticed someone had been standing outside waiting for her to come out, "Where…were you last…night…?" the person asked groggily, and there stood none other then Kagome's mother. When Kagome had woke up, she had found her mother sprawled out unconscious on the living room couch. Guess she had woken up. It was obvious though that her mother was still quite drunk from whatever she had done last night.

No human contact  
And if you interact  
Your life is on contract  
Your best bet is to stay away mother-fucker  
It's just one of those days

Her short black hair hung in the front of her face slightly in a messy curl, and she wore a short blue jean-skirt that wasn't much longer then her daughter's school uniform skirt. She wore a velvet-black shirt that hugged tightly around her chest, and revealed her stomach, and there were thick spaghetti-strap sleeves hanging around her shoulders, and black stockings that went up to her thighs were worn on her legs.

Yes, indeedy, she just screamed Hooker.

"I should be asking _you_ that." Kagome replied with a frustrated sigh, and violently shoved her mother out of the way so she could walk out of the bathroom & into the living room, "And how did you know I wasn't home, when you were nowhere to be seen?"

"When I left, I couldn't see you 'nywhere…" what she meant to say, was 'When I left last night, you weren't home' but she was still a little drunk from her little bar cruise last night, "Tell me where you went." Ms. Higurashi demanded, her voice more forceful.

"It's none of your business, dammit!" Kagome snapped, "Souta, come on, we're heading out!" Kagome called through the house as she picked up her backpack from the ground by the back of the dirty couch in the living room. Suddenly Kagome felt her mother's hand grab her shoulder, and force her to turn around so that they were face to face once more, "Don't you dare ignore me like that! I had a really bad night last night, and I'm _not _in the mood." Ms. Higurashi yelled with anger, her frustration & solemn thoughts opening her wits for her.

"What happened, Okaa-san?" Kagome asked her mother with very noticable FAKE concern, "Did some poor hobo you slept with last night fuck & run without paying? And it's none of your business where I was, so don't you try to act all 'motherly' with me, you stupid whore." Kagome criticized calmly, as if it were normal to call your mother a 'Stupid Whore' (which for her, it kinda was), as she pushed the hand that was holding unto her shoulder off. Deep down she knew what she was saying & doing was disrespectful, but she had lost all respect for her mother years ago. She used to be a respectable Miko, but now her mother was so messed up, she doubted she could even purify an inch-long bee demon.

Its all about the he says she says bullshit  
I think you better quit  
Lettin' shit slip  
Or you'll be leavin' with a fat lip

Ms. Higurashi just stared at her daughter with wide, surprised eyes. But that look of surprise quickly turned into a look of frustration, then pure anger, "Don't you _dare_ talk to me like that!" Ms. Higurashi yelled at her daughter, and suddenly struck her across the face hard, as the sound of hand against skin seemed to echo. Souta, who had been standing behind Kagome calmly waiting for the fight to end so they could head for school, was wide-eyed. He couldn't believe that his mom had just slapped his sister! Kagome didn't seem to move from her position, but it could be seen that she too was shocked. Her eyes seemed to have gone dead.

There was a long silence, as if no one knew what to say. Which they didn't.

Kagome was the first to react, as she turned around & grabbed Souta's wrist, dragging her little brother out the door, and slammed it closed hard. Not saying anything to her mother, leaving the adult to wallow in what she had done & the quiet loneliness.

_Its just one of those days…_

* * *

There seemed to be an odd & eerie silence as Kagome & Souta walked. Well, Souta walked, Kagome stormed down the street. Actually, Souta was sorta dragging along, since Kagome still held firmly to his wrist. 

Souta stared at her, feeling like he wanted to say something, but couldn't think of what. She looked both angry, sad, & lost in a world within her own mind, all at once. As if she were recalling a painful memory…the one that had just occurred a minute ago? That's what Souta thought, but he was wrong…she was recalling a very different memory, a more painful memory, one that existed long ago…

Suddenly, this bitter look spread across Kagome's face like a virus…as if she were going to cry?

'Wait, is she thinking about...?' Souta thought to himself, feeling slight panic welling within him, as he desperately thought of something to break the silence.

"Um…Onee-chan…are you...?" Souta started hesitantly, but was quickly cut off. "I'm fine." Kagome stated out dryly & turned around to face her little brother, letting go of the tight hold on his arm in the process, "Okaa-san is such a jerk sometimes, isn't she?" Kagome asked quizzically with a tiny laugh. Her sad face was now gone, and it was replaced by a small, yet slightly-sad, smile. Souta, happy that his sister didn't have that depressed look on her face any longer, gave out a small smile also, "Yeah…" he answered unsurely, finishing with a tiny, awkward laugh of his own.

The two seemed to have a strange brother-sister moment on that sidewalk, standing in silence with awkward smiles on their faces. Kagome loved her brother so much, even though he tried to act tough, he always really cared about her & made sure she was always alright, & her the same for him.

If it weren't for him, she'd have died ages ago.

"Hey! Souta, over here!" a voice of a boy called out to the two from across the street, breaking the mushy-sibling-moment & bringing them both out of their dazes. When the siblings looked in the direction of the voice, they could see a group of boys with graffiti cans writing random letters on a giant, yellow-white trashcan. The one that had called out to them stood in front on the very corner of the sidewalk, and was very distinguishable. He had soft orange hair, and pale beige skin. He looked very chunky, compared to all the other poor & skinny kids that lived in this dead city.

Honestly, if you had pasted whiskers on this kid, he would have looked like a chunky house-cat!

"Hey Buuyo, be right there!" Souta called over to his best friend, and turned to his sister, "I'm gonna go with them" Souta stated out while motioning over his shoulder to his friends, trying to gain her approval on the matter more rather then tell her.

"Okay." Kagome answered half-heartedly. But when Souta started walking away, she suddenly grabbed his arm & yanked him back, "What is it?" he asked his sister with slight annoyance. She kneeled down so that she had to look a little up to him, but the height equaled out since she was already inches taller then him, "Wait a second." Kagome commanded with a smirk, and instantly Souta knew she was doing, and his face turned into a grimace, but she started before he could protest. "Your face is dirty!" Kagome said quickly in a cute little voice, & licked her thumb, rubbing it on his cheek trying to clean an imaginary spot.

"Ewwww, Kagome, stop it!" Souta commanded while squirming in his sister's firm grip. Kagome stopped cleaning his face, but didn't stop with her embarrassing, "Oh look! Your buttons aren't buttoned right, _hunny_." Kagome said in a sarcastic-sympathetic tone, and starting buttoning up some of the buttons that were on the top of his blue uniform shirt, that had actually _really_ been crooked & buttoned incorrectly.

A parade of laughter could be heard over by the trashcan, from Souta's _loyal _gang-buddies, and most of the boys were slapping their knees or banging their hands against random objects, trying not to bust a gut from laughing so hard at their friend being embarrassed.

"Onee-chan! Let go of me, dammit! Onegai!" Souta pleaded with a face as red as a tomato from embarrassment. Kagome smirked, and let go of her brother, as he quickly headed down towards his friends, incase she changed mind of her mercy. His friends were still laughing.

"I'll see you at school, Souta-chan!" Kagome called after him with a wave, "And remember to look both ways before crossing the street." Kagome added in an informative tone. "Shut up…" Souta demanded both to Kagome & his friends…who were still trying to stop laughing, but laughing harder all the same. "Awww, why do you have to be so bwitter, wittle Souta-chaaaan?" Buuyo replied in a baby-voice, mocking his friend, which only encouraged more laughs, "And besides, I wouldn't mind being babied by Kagome. If ya know what I mean? _Hehe_" the 14 year old added slyly, as he nudged one of the other boys with his elbow. Souta's face wrinkled up, "Ewwww, dude, that's my _sister_!" Souta stated out in disgust, as he followed his friends down an alleyway, to do who knows what.

Kagome watched as the boys left, and continued to head down the street. 'Ahhhh, well, I feel better.' Kagome thought to herself as she continued to walk, very proud of her working attempt to cheer herself up.


	3. Already Broken Promises

Author's Notes: Wow, 3 chapters all uploaded in one day XP I originally had all this in one chapter, but it was 10, 000 words! So, I deleted the originalstory, &decided to brake it down. Sorry for any confusion this might have caused! T-T Please review, I hope you enjoyed reading, and I'll try to get the new chapter up as soon as I can :D

Disclaimer: Again, I don't own Inuyasha! O.O

* * *

Kagome walked down the dirty sidewalk, ignoring all the whistles, hoots, & ogles from the perverted men that were sitting on the sidewalk, most of them were holding cans & asking for 'Donations'. This city was so pathetic, really. The sky was a dingy gray, from all the smoke that flowed out of the random factories. There was trash galore polluting the streets cups, bottles, just about everything you could think of was lying around everywhere you walked. Trashcans carelessly toppled over, graffiti lacing every building. Even the buildings themselves seemed to be dirty…is was as if the city had given up on itself. 

She had a destination in mind, like she always did in the morning, and looked down house after house trying to find it, although she knew perfectly well where it was. Guess you could call it a habit. After finally finding the desired house, she frowned on the sidewalk, 'Damn, she's not out here _again_…' Kagome thought to herself with a groan of annoyance, and decided to stand outside the house for a little longer, patiently waiting.

Kagome huffed. Okay, it had been 10 minutes, forget patience.

Kagome stormed up the driveway, dodging a navy blue car. The one they had been driving the night before & earlier this morning. Once up & over the front porch steps, Kagome knocked onto the door with force, "Sango-chan! I told if you weren't outside, I would leave withou-" Kagome was cut off as the door opened, to reveal a tall boy with black hair & a very toned chest that peaked out of his shirt very noticeably.

He was just visiting for a few months because break had come at his College. He looked like he just woken up seconds ago, with his hair a little messy & sexily hanging over his eyes a bit. On his body, he wore a white tang-top that revealed his arms, like the ones people would sometimes wear while working out, and plain navy-blue pants on his legs that were pretty loose. Kohaku looked like one of those beefy tough-guys, but was actually very sweet, and kinda a bookworm. The college he was currently studying at was way out of the Taijiya's league, but he had gotten a Scholarship.

"Ah, Kagome-san, I thought it was you. That's some fist you have, your knocks woke me up! Haha" Kagome blushed from embarrassment at this, "You're here to pick up Sango, ne?" Kohaku, Sango's older brother, replied with a warm smile.

"Um…hai, Kohaku, is your sister here?" Kagome asked nervously to the college student, 'Boy, he seems to get hotter every time I see him…' Kagome thought to herself, desperately trying to stop this weird urge to twirl a stand of her hair & giggle. It wasn't like she could flirt with him, even if she had wanted to (which she firmly convinced herself, she didn't!), he was _unavailable_.

He had a girlfriend. A really sexy _Youkai girlfriend_, as a matter-of-fact.

"Hai, she's puking in the bathroom" Kohaku answered disdainfully, and motioned for her to come in. The house was a lot like Kagome's, not very nice, nor very clean. Sango's father was lazily sitting on the living room couch watching Football, munching on either chips, or popcorn, or something different all together, Kagome couldn't really tell. Sango's mother had died when she was very young, & Kagome didn't really know how, she just knew that she had died & Sango had said she hadn't really gotten anytime to know her.

Kagome headed to Sango's bedroom, where her bathroom was located, "I'm such an idiot…how could I get myself into something like this…?" she could hear Sango's melancholy voice come from behind the closed bathroom door with a sigh. "Sango-chan, is everything okay…?" Kagome asked with sincere concern, knocking on the door lighter then she had on the front door. "K-_Kagome-chan_!" she could hear Sango exclaim with surprise, and could hear rustling inside the bathroom. Some more shuffling, & a few other sounds that Kagome couldn't identify were heard, then suddenly the door opened revealing a very tired & sick-looking Sango, "Hai…? Kagome-chan, I'm fine, I just don't feel very well this morning, as usual y'know."

"Sango-chan, you certainly don't_ look_ well…" Kagome agreed anxiously, while looking at a pale-faced Sango, "Maybe you just had too much to drink?" Kagome suggested while raising an eyebrow.

Sango looked unsure & looked away, "Uh, no…I mean, _maybe_…um, I'll be out in a second, wait in the front for me, okay?" Sango stuttered out in giant chunks of sentence, trying to decide on what to say in a confused & dry tone, then closed the bathroom door. Kagome decided that, since Sango seemed to want to be alone, she wouldn't bother her by stalking the bathroom door, and went to go wait in the front. About 7 minutes later, she could spot the Taijiya's front door open & a rushed-together Sango coming out of it, her backpack hanging messily over her shoulder, "N-No, Kohaku…we did not use your car…stop asking me already…No, I'm not l-lying!" she could hear Sango yell in through her door towards her brother, before she slammed it closed & walked towards Kagome who was waiting on the sidewalk. Then they started walking in silence. Kohaku probably suspected something about what happened last night, and Sango never was really good at lying.

Kagome was still wary for her friend. It was natural to be a little sick after a night of partying, but it was this suspicious feeling that Sango was hiding something from her. And what had she meant by what she had said in the bathroom? Actually, she had felt this way for quite a few months now, the feeling that Sango was hiding something important from her.. "Are you sure you're okay? You could have just stayed home if you're still sick this morning…" Kagome stated out again.

"No, it's not completely the alcohol, Kagome…well, at least I think it isn't…" Sango wondered aloud, more to herself then to Kagome. It was as if there was something Sango _wanted_ to tell Kagome, but kept deciding at the last minute not too. There was an awkward silence between the two, and Kagome sensed the air suddenly get tense. In a desperate attempt to lighten the mood, Kagome decided to do some of her obnoxious teasing...

"Sango, you're not becoming one of those people that make themselves throw up to lose weight are you?" Kagome asked with a convincing sigh, "Way too many girls are doing that nowadays".

Sango stared at her friend with a raised eyebrow, as if saying 'what the hell?', "No! Of course not." Sango stated out calmly.

"Because, ya know, it only makes you uglier. Bony people look creepy, and-" Kagome continued, pretending to completely ignore Sango as if she didn't exist. "Kagome! I'm not doing that." Sango answered again in a now more forceful in tone.

"-and, you have a beautiful body, so you have no need to do that anyways! And you may be gaining a _little _weight-" she continued. And indeed, Sango's _did_ look a little bit larger then usual, she may have only gained 7 pounds or so, but against her skinny body & curvy figure, it was noticeable.

Sango didn't seem to be very fazed by the fat joke, and was starting to lose her temper. "_KAGOME_!" Sango cut Kagome off again with a loud frustrated sigh, "Will you _Shut up_!" Sango added with a furious sigh & shook her head, her 'Anger' side furiously peaking it's head out of the corner that was 'Meek Sango'. Kagome knew that wasn't it, the throwing up thing, because like as it had been stated, Sango was very bad at lying. It would have been obvious if she had been denying this, and was lying about it. The air seemed more carefree now, though.

"Heh...so what is it?" Kagome asked again, getting back to her original question. Sango looked at Kagome regretfully & sighed, turning her head away & looking absentmindedly into a 7 Eleven window that they happened to be passing at that moment, "Nothing, Kagome..._really_." Sango answered in an unsure tone, afraid to look at her friend. "Sango…" was Kagome's exasperated starting reply, "-you know, I'm not an idiot, I know when you're keeping something from me.", then she grabbed Sango's arm, so she could turn her around & they could be face to face so she could read Sango's expression. "I want too, but-" Sango suddenly cut herself off as she noticed Kagome's descending arm, and realizing, Kagome tried to pull it away, but Sango grabbed it before she had a chance to hide it from veiw.

She had just noticed something for the first time. There seemed to be new scars…

"Kagome, I thought you said you _stopped_…" Sango said in a dead-serious tone, as she took her eyes off Kagome's right arm, and looked up at her, a pained look in her eyes. Kagome quickly pulled her arm away, putting both of them behind her back, "I _did_! I swear!" Kagome said quickly with a forced smile.

"If you don't stop doing that, you're going to kill yourself! Slashing your wrists & arms doesn't help anything, Kagome." Sango said in an informative tone. "And remind me, since when did you become my mother?" Kagome countered with that sarcastic tone of hers.

Sango smirked, "And remind me, since when did you become so interested in knowing my business?" refering to Kagome's sudden interest in Sango's secrets lately.

Bullseye! She so had that coming. Kagome could think of nothing as a comeback, and just stuck her tongue out at her friend childishly, trying to regain some of her lost pride. "I'm _serious_, Kagome! Honestly, I don't know what I'd do if you died…you're my only real friend, y'know?" Sango got back to the conversation beforehand, now looking as if she was trying to hold back tears.

"Sango-chan!" Kagome quickly stated out confidently, smiling forcefully while trying to take that depressed look off her friend's face, "Don't worry, I _did_ stop, honest! I got these new scars from fighting. I swear. You know how I like fighting, right? Well, um…" Kagome took a quick pause to think of a substantial lie, "…I…I got attacked by this gang the other day, on the way home from school, and I didn't try to run away or anything...'cause you know how I'm not like that. Well, this real big guy had a knife, & I just got a few cuts! That's how this happened." she blurted out overly quickly, trying to hide this nervous look on her face by pushing on smiles & smirks.

Sango tilted her head sideways a little, and wrinkled up her nose a bit, "Really? You're telling the truth?" Sango wasn't really sure…but she was as good at telling if people were lying, as she was lying herself. And again, the odds were against her on that talent.

"I swear!" Kagome said again, obviously acting overly perky. Sango just looked down at her shoes unsurely again, she didn't believe Kagome.

Kagome wrapped her arm around her friend's shoulder, and looked at her, "I promise - _I'll never die on you without warning like that_…and I especially wouldn't die by doing something as pathetic as killing _myself_! How stupid would that be? If I die, I'd want to die in a more…thrilling way, like in a fight or something." Kagome said calmly while rolling her eyes, "Believe me, would I lie to you?" she asked forcing another smile on.

**…yes, I just did right there…**

Sango just looked up at her, smiled back weakly, and hugged her, "You're my best friend Kagome, of course I believe you". Kagome could do nothing but bite down on her lip in guilt over Sango's shoulder, 'Dammit, Sango-chan, why do you have to be so damn gullible!' Kagome thought to herself in frustration._**

* * *

Of course, I had only been lying about the 'Lying to Her' part…I was truthful about never killing myself out of the blue…or at least, that's what I had thought…**_


End file.
